"Who knows the mind of our God?..." So goes the first line of the chorus of a frequently sung song at my church - a song that I adore. As I sing it I consider just how much He has lead me without my knowledge or understanding, yet so often I neglect this understanding. So often I can say, yes God's plan will come to pass, yet still loose time worrying about what I should be doing for Him.
I am surrounded by people, like Amber, who are set on serving the Lord with specific goals in mind - meanwhile I feel so lost as to knowing what He wants from me. Today I read chapter 18 of Shadow of the Almighty called "Under Way," recounting the beginning of Jim Elliot's first long term mission trip to Ecuador. The path it took for him to get to that point involved lots of prayer and service. Prayer, this is what I need to be diligent in, that I may seek the Lord's will for my life, constantly leaning on His guidance. He brought me here so I must trust that He will not abandon me now, "He is faithful to complete it." If I seem repetitive, it is for my purposes, for I need to remind myself of this truth. Please Pray that I may trust that the Lord will lead me towards His perfect will, no matter my faults or imperfections.
Tonight I had the opportunity to go out to the night bazaar and see the little shops Thailand offered. It reminded me a lot of the temporary set ups around NYC, especially china town, except condensed - one after another. There are lots of tourists walking around, but you still get a chance to see a little bit of Thai culture in the way items are presented, the types of activities offered, and the way some dress. I also had the chance to meet Emily, another amazing person with her heart set on serving the Lord. Emily has lived in Thailand for three years, and worked with School of Promise, but now the Lord is leading her to different places. She is waiting on the Lord, and it was such an encouragement to hear about her leaps of faith as she seeks to follow His will. I also heard about different missions organizations from her, and I'm excited to check them out. How He loves me that He answers prayers as I meet people and form relationships. We are called to love with brotherly affection, yes, and through that the Lord has many blessings - for me right now He is teaching me of His will. I cannot pretend I know the mind of my God, but I must stay prayerful that I may trust He will lead me.